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In gratitude for a Special Relationship

Care: Crucial Conversations

Celebrating an Authentic Connection

This year we celebrated 10 years of a committed caregiving /receiving relationship between my daughter Carly and her personal assistant Heide.

In her book, Love’s Labor, Eva Feder Kittay called the relationship between her daughter, who has a disability and her caregiver, the relationship with no name, a phrase invented by Kittay’s son. It is an apt description. I have often hesitated to describe Heide as Carly’s personal assistant. It sounds so businesslike. It does not nearly describe the dynamics between them, but there really is nothing that does. It is what I always hoped for Carly. They are authentically connected. Carly has been spared the typical revolving door of staff through Heide’s dedication. It offers our family the promise that the love we share with Carly will continue in the form of other relationships. It is what we hope to see other’s achieve who need long term care.

We want to give a big shout out here to Heide for her commitment. Carly’s life has improved dramatically through Heide’s care. It is indeed an example of transforming care.

We invite others to respond by sharing their experiences of transforming relationships.

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